The Mud and the Naysayers
Yesterday I had the chance to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen in what seems like forever. It was nice to sit and visit.
There was one gal there I didn't know, but I was so glad to meet her. See, she has a story just like me. This past year she's lost in excess of 70 pounds - all on her own. I can't even imagine what she looked like before. The first thing I noticed about her was her incredible energy. I wanted to plug into her and absorb it. It was one of those slow-moving days for me.
While we were chatting, she asked me,
"When you were losing weight, did your friends and family ever discourage you?" or something like that.
Oh man did they.
It took me back, and I remember the comments all too well.
Let's see...
"Why are you dieting? You're too skinny. Why are you eating like that? Why don't you just eat like normal? You're going to be anorexic. Why are you doing this anyway? Why do you want to build muscle? You're going to look like a man. Why are you taking supplements? You're going to hurt your body. Why is the gym so important? Why do you have to get up so early? Can't you just let it go this once? You're an addict. You're out of balance. You look good enough. You're too hard. You're too soft."
...and if they weren't verbally saying it, it was the behind the back "chatter" or the "eyes". I could sense it.
I heard it all.
Why is it so hard for some women to support each other? Why can't we just be happy for each others' successes? Why do some women feel it's their job to tear others down when they are happy, when they feeling some success, when they are making major healthy lifestyle improvements? Why is it some women say hurtful things or take jabs at others' expenses - fully knowing how it will make that person feel? I'm not saying ALL women are like that. I'm not one of them. But we've probably ALL had encounters with women who ARE like that. And my question is, WHY?
I have always wore my heart on my sleeve. It can be a strength and a weakness. Sometimes the weakness side of it gets hold of me though, and I let things bother me more than they should. I don't like people tearing me down when I'm trying to do the right thing. Sound familiar?
Yesterday's conversation really stuck with me because as of late I've been dealing with my own trials. With some of my recent successes (beyond weight loss) I'm still dealing with the naysayers and the talk and chatter behind my back. I can sense it. I can feel it. I hear it "through the grapevine". I get the cold-shoulder and the doubters more often than I'd like to admit...and it hurts.
I know it's up to me to choose my reaction, but the sting is still there. Unless I'm cold-hearted I can't say that when someone acts, says, or does something hurtful to me that it's not going to stir up certain feelings.
I know my heart. I know I'm trying to do things for the right reasons. I know I'm trying to live healthy, eat healthy, and have been very blessed as result. My goal now is to help others, to hopefully inspire others, to encourage others to find their own path. I don't ever want to be a naysayer because I truly believe that anyone can do anything if they put their heart and soul into it.
Why do I share this and what does it have to do with mud? ha ha! Well, during my run yesterday, I picked up an awful lot of mud on my shoes. It had obviously rained through the night. It made every step more difficult, heavy, and uncomfortable. I had mud splashing on my calves, and I nearly stumbled more than once. My normal beautiful carefree run was harder, and I wondered if I should just turn back.
Then I thought about how that applies to what I and many of you are probably going through right now. We are all on a beautiful path. Many of us are finding success - even little glimpses of it. From time to time we'll have to deal with the "mud", the naysayers. It'll be difficult, it might be hard. You might want to give up. You might question why you're doing it. You might wonder if it's worth it. But it is.
YOU know YOUR heart. YOU know why YOU are doing it. YOU know what your end in mind is. Don't let the naysayers stop you from achieving YOUR success.
Rise above it. Try to ignore it. Shake off the "mud" and move on.
That's what I'm trying to do. I'm dealing with it. I'm not going to give-up or give-in because of a few peoples' looks, comments, or naysaying comments. It still hurts, but I'm stronger than that.
Needless to say, my run ended beautifully yesterday. Once I decided NOT to let the "mud" ruin my run, I took a deep breath and picked up my stride...enjoying every heavy step.
Enjoy your journey...don't let anyone take it away from you!
jen.fit.training@gmail.com
